Triangle Mamas

Help Save Project Enlightenment

You might have noticed that many of us here at Triangle Mamas have strong opinions about the new direction of the Wake County School Board. While Triangle Mamas takes no official stance on political matters, our writers are free to hold their own opinions and express them here in a respectful manner.

Today, I received this email from a friend. In the interest of getting the information out quickly, I've simply cut and pasted it here. I hope that if you care about Project Enlightenment, and quite frankly, you should, that you will join us in a push to save the program. We are lucky to have a program such as this in Wake County, and losing it would be a horrible blow to our community.

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Ladies,

I have recently been made aware that a priceless resource in our community is being threatened by budget cuts and I wanted to pass along this information before it is too late to do anything about it.
 
When Owen started pre-school at age 3 his teachers noticed almost immediately that he was having serious social issues.  Jeff and I were asked if we wanted a representative from Project Enlightenment to come and observe him and make recommendations.  They did, and thus began a wonderful, constructive and life altering relationship.  Owen is now a happy 2nd grader with friends: something we really feared might never happen.  Through workshops (for Owen and me), therapy and one-on-one sessions over 2 years (all paid for through our tax dollars) we were able to help Owen learn how to handle himself and Jeff and I were given lessons in how to handle him. We will be forever thankful for this service that we never even knew existed before Owen began having his "issues."
 
For those of you who are unfamiliar with Project Enlightenment: it is an early childhood education and intervention program of the Wake County Public School System, serving teachers and parents of young children, ages birth through kindergarten.  It is very unique and we are one of the few counties in the country to offer such services, though other counties (including Fairfax Va). are using it as a model to start similar programs because of the incredible success of ours.
 
I come from a family of educators, so I have been lectured again and again about the importance of early childhood programs.  Project Enlightenment is everything you could ask for for at-risk children, and all under one roof.  Please check out their web page to see everything they offer.
 
Please see the e-mail below for how we can all help to save P.E.  Unformtualy, we do not have much time.  But there is a form letter and the e-mail addresses of all the School Board members to make it easy if you would like to contact them.
 
Thank you!
Jennifer

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Hi Wake County friends,
 
Elizabeth Jordan (formally of the Justice Center) sent this to me and asked for help in getting e-mails in to the Wake School Board to save this incredible resource.  Please take a moment to see if you could take action on this.  It would be a tremendous loss to children and families if this program is cut as they suggest.
 
Thanks for your consideration!
 
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PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, COLLEAGUES, EDUCATORS - ANYONE IN THE TRIANGLE WHO YOU BELIEVE MIGHT BE WILLING TO HELP. ONLY TAKES A MINUTE! THANKS!!!!

The future of Project Enlightenment is being threatened. The Wake County School Board votes THIS TUESDAY, MARCH 2nd on proposed severe budget cuts for this amazing resource in our community. There are 2 easy, effective ways YOU can make a difference:

1 - Participate in Email the Education Board campaign

·  Cut and paste the following paragraph into a new email:

I ask that you support the infants and young children in Wake County by supporting Project Enlightenment and that you NOT cut funding to this vital program. Project Enlightenment is an essential and cost effective part of the Wake County Public School System.   Overwhelming evidence shows the importance of early intervention – providing services to young children with extra needs and their families will save Wake county tax dollars in the long run.  Countless early childhood teachers in our county and beyond have received invaluable training through Project Enlightenment, benefiting countless children enrolled in preschool programs not only today but in the years to come. Please do not cut Project Enlightenment’s funding or services – Wake County’s infants and young children are counting on you.

Feel free to add any additional statements here regarding your personal involvement with Project Enlightenment. Specific examples of ways your family has benefited are great.

·  Sign email with your name, and city, and, if you would like, kids' names and ages

·  Email to school board members -  [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]

2 - Come to the Board of Education meeting - Tuesday, March 2 at 3:00 - Board Room, 2nd Floor (3600 Wake Forest Road, Raleigh, NC 27609 )

It is essential that we have as many people as possible at the meeting. It will be much harder for the Board to make cuts if there is visible public opposition. Individuals interested in speaking during the Public Hearing must sign up at least 10 minutes before the hearing starts and will be given 3 minutes to address the Board and audience.

Project Enlightenment serves all children in Wake County from birth through kindergarten, along with their families and teachers.  Project Enlightenment provides:

• Consulting and developmental screening for children
• Training and education for parents, teachers and other service providers
• A resource center and lending library 
• Parent counseling and a TALKline to assist with any issue – the topics can include anything from potty training and basic discipline to concerns for special needs children
• Demonstration classrooms that serve typically developing, at- risk, and special needs children that demonstrate best practices for teacher training

An Old Pair of Shoes

I began singing in church at a very young age. I can't remember when exactly, but I don't think I was a teen yet. I continued in the pattern no matter what church I went to at the time and usually enjoyed it. That is, until I started going to my current church. For a couple years, I refused to volunteer in any way because I felt I was "burnt out". I came to the services late and left before most people could gather their belongings. And if I am honest, it was really nice to let that selfishness play out. But it was only a matter of time before I found myself being pulled toward what I believe is my calling. And I began singing with the band.

Worship has been my lifeline on so many occasions that I can't count. In times where I felt so lost and nothing could touch me, a song could slice me in half. Not destructively, but in that surgical, I'm here to help you kind of way. When I took time off after Oscar was born, I again welcomed the reprieve. But I was a bit surprised to find that again, while a break was nice, I felled pulled to serve again. I don't know why it surprised me. It's not like life stops when you have a child. I just figured I would move on to something else. But I should know better!

One would think that stepping into an old pair of shoes would be comforting and welcome. Many times in life, I think this is absolutely true. But like so much else after carrying and birthing a child, those shoes just don't fit like they used to. This has been no clearer in my life than when I started singing in the worship band again. It has been almost exactly one year since I stepped down. For the most part, the time has passed without notice. But I knew it was time.

As I arrived at practice I expected my old shoes just waiting for me to fill. However, something strange happened.I recognized the place but the fit was completely different. New faces, new songs, even a new stage! There would be a lot more than my jitters to overcome! OH, hello nerves! My voice tries to betray me. Along with my waistline, it has become relaxed and unforgiving when forced to go somewhere it doesn't belong. I am excited to get to know the talented people around me that I haven't had a chance to connect with yet. I am learning that even in this process of rejoining a ministry that I really love, I will remain forever changed. The shoes are there, but the fit is completely different. And that is ok. Having a child changes everything. Everything! I am starting to wonder if comfort is the anomaly. As if to say that we are constantly in a state of flux save for a day of rest here and there. It's been amazing to see my transformation into motherhood over the past year. If I can get outside myself I can almost see it slowly making it's way through my body like blood through my veins.

The beauty of worship is that we are all just people. Singers and musicians who love to worship and are called to help lead others. The difference now is in me. Here I am doing something I have done countless times in my life. Yet, I do it as a mother for the first time. I am starting over. It's such a privilege. What old shoes do you have? Have you found them to "fit differently" since becoming a mom? I'd love to hear your stories!

Andrea has a one year old son named Oscar who has turned her life upside-down and inside-out. And she wouldn't change a thing. Follow her journey at Lil-Kid-Things, on Twitter and on FaceBook!

School Zone

By Cyndi

I have a confession: As the mother of a rising kindergartner, there's a tiny part of me that likes the Wake County School Board's vision of neighborhood schools. My house sits on a one-block street, but there's a line beside my yard that sends my kids to a different school than the kids next door. Our assigned school isn't far, but it's not in our neighborhood, either. I'd love for my children to attend school here, in our neighborhood. We could walk there in 20 minutes, joining with friends to form a daily parade. They would be in school with kids they know, and whose parents I know—a good school that's safe, familiar and stable.

But as a former teacher and a current parent, public education advocate and taxpayer, I cannot support an approach that could lead to resegregated schools, no matter how lovely my personal scenario might seem.

I don't want my children in a school with fewer qualified teachers or high teacher turnover, both of which contribute to instability. And I don't want my children in a school where the PTA struggles to raise funds and find volunteers to support classroom basics. And I don't want my children in a school where students must achieve in spite of the odds stacked against them. Because I don't want these things for my children, I don't want them for any children in Wake County.

These are the things that my research and experience tell me happen in schools overwhelmed by poverty. It's not because poor students are less capable or some other hogwash about poor kids needing to sit beside rich kids in order to learn. Students in poverty simply face so many additional challenges that work against their success. The neighborhoods in Wake County aren't different than those in much of the country—by and large, they're sorted by socioeconomic status, meaning a neighborhood approach to student assignment will create a system of haves and have-nots in our schools.

When my son starts kindergarten later this year, he and I won't care whether he's sitting next to the child of a millionaire or a child whose parents struggle to put food on the table each night. What will matter to us is knowing that he is in a safe, nurturing school environment, that he has dedicated teachers with the experience and enthusiasm to help children learn, and that he and his classmates can grow together as they explore the world around them. I support policies that help make those things happen at every school in every town across Wake County, not just in "the right neighborhoods" or in those that managed to defy some odds.

Like many parents, I wrestle with making decisions in the best interest of my own children. But our teachers, administrators and elected officials don't have the luxury of focusing on a few children. The law requires them to do what is in the best interest of all children, regardless of what neighborhood they live in or who their parents are—even if it means my kids won't be walking to school.

This post was first published in the "Front Porch" section of The Independent Weekly. When Cyndi isn't soapboxing about the public schools in print, she can be found writing online about kids, books, music, food and other random things at My Convertible Life (the blog formerly known as Junius & Pippi Take the Cake).

New Web Site for Safety Information

Attention Parents!

The JPMA (Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association) has just launched a new section of their Web site, specifically for you, called the Parenthood.

Caregivers can get access to important information, recall announcements and tips on safety from well-renowned safety experts like Alison Rhodes. Rhodes provides advice like her ABC’s of Safety:

Awareness is the most critical element. Babies begin rolling over, crawling and walking when you least expect it. While your child might not be able to roll off the changing table today, by tomorrow she could. Recognize that every child is different and be aware of your child's "vulnerabilities." Some children are natural climbers so securing heavy furniture to the walls might be the top priority. Other children are more interested in ingesting anything they can get their hands on. For them, cabinet and drawer locks for the kitchen and bathrooms would be more important.

Barriers are necessary to ensure your baby's safety. Whether it's installing gates on stairs or locks on cabinets, it's important that safeguards be put in place. Don't forget the existing barriers in your home. Home offices, exercise rooms and laundry rooms are no place for children. By installing automatic door closers and bolts at the top of the doors you can keep these areas off limits. Locks and alarms should also be placed on patio doors. Little ones can very quickly learn how to open a slider door.

Controlling your child's environment will allow them the freedom to explore while at the same time protecting them from hazards. We call them "safe zones." These are areas that have been secured and where your child is always within your view. We occasionally hear objections, especially from first time parents, that they want their child to be able to have the run of the house. This is risky as there are too many opportunities for your child to be out of your sight. Safe zones can be large enough to give your child ample room to explore and play while in a secure area.

Sign up now for a FREE membership to the Parenthood and receive important safety updates as well as have a chance to win some cool baby gear!

Erin can be found hanging out with her 13 month old son and husband and on her blog Tales from a Marketing Mama. She also serves as Director of Marketing Communications at juvenile distributor Scandinavian Child.

Margaritas

By Sue

I had the pleasure of grabbing margaritas with some girlfriends the other night and the topics of discussion were about the same as they always are when we get together.

We catch up, tell each other about what recent events may be going on in our lives and with our families. We talk about our kids, compare stories and ask for advice. We then move on to current events and things of that nature, but the conversation always rounds it’s way over to husbands.

This evening the common theme to the husband topic was equality. Each and everyone of us discussed how we felt care giving equality fell short.

Now don’t get me wrong, don’t get the idea that we get together to bash our husbands. I was just surprised at how each one of us were bothered or annoyed by the same exact things.

Our husbands range in age, height, weight, race, educational background, you name it, but it was surprising to me that all of our stories sounded identical.

Each one of us felt like we were left to carry the weight of care giving. Working mom or stay at home mom, the complaints were the same.

Examples:

"I take care of the kids all day and all week by myself, but when he does it for a couple of hours, I feel like he is acting like he deserves a medal!"

"I love when he wants to spend time with the kids and let me relax, but coming home to a house that has exploded and having to be the one to clean it up is not my idea of relaxing. Why can’t he take care of the kids and pick up after himself at the same time. I am not asking him to clean the whole house, just pick up after lunch, block time, etc."

"I work too, but how come the majority of the house and child care falls on me?"

Sound familiar?

This left me thinking, are we asking for too much or not giving our husbands the benefit of the doubt? Not exactly, but I do think we can cut them some slack. This, especially for me, is easier said than done.

I think we need to realize that the majority of care giving falls into our laps because we (as stay at home moms at least) do it 99.9% of the time already. It comes easily to us and we are used to doing it. When we ask them or they want to do a majority of the tasks we do on a daily basis, it isn’t going to come as easily to them, mainly because they don’t have that much practice time.

I see this in my house a lot. It is a piece of cake for me to wrangle the kids, make dinner, clean up the playroom, fold laundry, and talk on the phone at the same time because that is what I do all day everyday. I am trying to learn to cut my husband some slack when it comes to multitasking at this magnitude.

The only time I have a problem is when a time comes that requires him to do everything, it leaves him stressed, resentful and ill-equipped.

This conversation with my girlfriends stayed with me, because I think this is an argument that will never be resolved. It will never be equal, or at least it will never feel equal.

Our husbands most likely feel the same way as we do. Do we understand what it feels like to have the stress of the family’s financial wellbeing fall solely onto us? (Now, I am not a working mom, so I can only tell my side of the story. Working moms, chime in and give me your side!) I know I think I do, but in reality I don’t.

I believe it all comes down to balance and I am finding that balance is not so easily accomplished. I personally find it difficult to find balance between being a mother, a wife, a friend and then squeezing in time for just me.

Balance is what we all strive for, because when we are balanced we feel that things run smoothly, our lives are less stressful and we are in a mindset to really enjoy those around us.

One of my many goals for 2010 is to take steps towards feeling and being more balanced.

What do you think?

Will this argument ever be resolved?

We will ever really be equal?

What is it like for all the working moms out there that have to balance even more than I do?

When Sue isn’t trying to balance her kids and the rest of her life, she can be found blogging at Motherhood and Me  or chatting away on Twitter.