by Erin
I love Christmas. It’s such a MAGICAL time for me. I love being with my family. I love the spirit of the season. I have fond memories of Santa Clause. I loved the stories, I loved leaving out yummy goodies for the reindeer and I loved the simple magic of Jolly Ol’ St. Nick. I have no recollection of the day I found out he wasn’t real. Not a smidge of a catastrophe or a peek of being devastated lingers in my head.
Imagine my surprise when a few years ago, my husband made some off-hand comment about not doing Santa with our future children. Um…excuse me? I don’t know that I heard you correctly, WHAT?
For the last few years, I call him SCROOGE at least 2-3 times over the holiday season and we make a joke. But now the time is actually upon us to figure this thing out. I know that technically the Bug will have NO idea about Santa this year, and probably won’t next year either for that matter. But it’s the principle. And I feel we need to get to the bottom of it now.
I’ll admit…we haven’t had an in-depth conversation about this yet. I’m sort of avoiding it because I feel deep down that my husband will have a point and I’ll understand that point regardless of the fact that I want to tell him he has no soul and run and hide under the covers. He just doesn’t want to lie to our children – not out and out about something completely fictional. (We’ll work on the white lie with him later.)
So what do we do?
Do we simply talk about Santa in the context of Christmas but never say he’s coming to visit? (Ouch, I just felt a jab in my heart.) Do I tell the Bug that his daddy doesn’t believe in magic and fairy dust and to not listen to him? (Ok, bad idea.) I just don’t want our kid to be the one who ruins it for everyone else. I can just imagine the phone calls I get from parents telling me the Bug told their kid “You silly, Santa Clause is a made-up story by adults who enjoy perpetuating lies to their children for their own pleasure.” ACK! I don’t want that.
I’m not one to say that he’s watching you as I know some families do. It makes sense to me as a way to get your children to behave, but I sort of think it’s creepy. The idea of some old man watching me when I’m sleeping gives me the willies. I just want the Bug to be able to write Christmas lists…to see his excitement on Christmas morning as he looks out to see what Santa brought for him. I guess it would be just as exciting to see what mom and dad brought him, but that just doesn’t seem as fun to me.
And the hubs and I are in complete agreement about taking him to see Santa at the mall. That sounds like PURE HELL to me. It won't happen. I'm not standing in line with a bunch of snotty nosed, H1N1 ridden kids just to sit my child on some random guy's lap. Wow...I didn't realize I felt so strongly until I spit out that sentence. Guess there's a bit of Scrooge in everyone!
But seriously, I know there has to be a happy medium. I just want the Bug to have a little bit of Santa. I know we can’t be the only family who has to deal with this issue.
What do you think? How do we make this work?
Erin also blogs at her Parents Pick 2009 winning blog at Motherhood in the Industry. Follow her on Twitter @Mktg_Mama.
I love Christmas. It’s such a MAGICAL time for me. I love being with my family. I love the spirit of the season. I have fond memories of Santa Clause. I loved the stories, I loved leaving out yummy goodies for the reindeer and I loved the simple magic of Jolly Ol’ St. Nick. I have no recollection of the day I found out he wasn’t real. Not a smidge of a catastrophe or a peek of being devastated lingers in my head.
Imagine my surprise when a few years ago, my husband made some off-hand comment about not doing Santa with our future children. Um…excuse me? I don’t know that I heard you correctly, WHAT?
For the last few years, I call him SCROOGE at least 2-3 times over the holiday season and we make a joke. But now the time is actually upon us to figure this thing out. I know that technically the Bug will have NO idea about Santa this year, and probably won’t next year either for that matter. But it’s the principle. And I feel we need to get to the bottom of it now.
I’ll admit…we haven’t had an in-depth conversation about this yet. I’m sort of avoiding it because I feel deep down that my husband will have a point and I’ll understand that point regardless of the fact that I want to tell him he has no soul and run and hide under the covers. He just doesn’t want to lie to our children – not out and out about something completely fictional. (We’ll work on the white lie with him later.)
So what do we do?
Do we simply talk about Santa in the context of Christmas but never say he’s coming to visit? (Ouch, I just felt a jab in my heart.) Do I tell the Bug that his daddy doesn’t believe in magic and fairy dust and to not listen to him? (Ok, bad idea.) I just don’t want our kid to be the one who ruins it for everyone else. I can just imagine the phone calls I get from parents telling me the Bug told their kid “You silly, Santa Clause is a made-up story by adults who enjoy perpetuating lies to their children for their own pleasure.” ACK! I don’t want that.
I’m not one to say that he’s watching you as I know some families do. It makes sense to me as a way to get your children to behave, but I sort of think it’s creepy. The idea of some old man watching me when I’m sleeping gives me the willies. I just want the Bug to be able to write Christmas lists…to see his excitement on Christmas morning as he looks out to see what Santa brought for him. I guess it would be just as exciting to see what mom and dad brought him, but that just doesn’t seem as fun to me.
And the hubs and I are in complete agreement about taking him to see Santa at the mall. That sounds like PURE HELL to me. It won't happen. I'm not standing in line with a bunch of snotty nosed, H1N1 ridden kids just to sit my child on some random guy's lap. Wow...I didn't realize I felt so strongly until I spit out that sentence. Guess there's a bit of Scrooge in everyone!
But seriously, I know there has to be a happy medium. I just want the Bug to have a little bit of Santa. I know we can’t be the only family who has to deal with this issue.
What do you think? How do we make this work?
Erin also blogs at her Parents Pick 2009 winning blog at Motherhood in the Industry. Follow her on Twitter @Mktg_Mama.
We are totally doing Santa. I love him. I still wish I believed.
But I'm a sap.
We have the Elf on the Shelf who comes out right after Thanksgiving, but we also have the Fisher Price Nativity set.
I'm all in for Christmas. Legends, stories, traditions, religion, and Santa too.
Posted by: marty | December 08, 2009 at 09:55 PM
We won't be doing gifts from Santa in our house. We're those people. We'll talk about the real St. Nicholas and how he helped the poor and that's why we give gifts. We'll still get the lists and enjoy Santa as a character. I think the magic will still be there no matter what you decide! It IS Christmas after all :-)
Posted by: Andrea | December 08, 2009 at 10:09 PM
I feel for ya, girl! We are going to do Santa but I'm not going to go on and on about Santa. Just as much as I need to!
I agree that part of the magic of Christmas is Santa bringing presents. And honestly, by the time Bug is old enough to be told Santa doesn't exist, he'll probably have a good hunch about it anyway!
Posted by: Melissa | December 08, 2009 at 10:31 PM
we do santa- we even do the mall santa but that is because my 3 yr old asked to see him, she wanted to wait in line (we didn't) when she saw him. and her and my 22month old happily graced his lap. but my family does believe in magic, even if it is coincidence or fate or the weather- we look to the fairy dust of it all. and so do our children. mothering magazine had a wonderful article about fairies and all things make believe and the dilemma of including them or not into your life. childhood is a time of wonderment- and whether fostered or not your children will make up mystical creatures to pretend about. why not help the fairy tale? its just a character- the same you would find in any book, movie, or folk tale. use it how you need or want to in your family!
Posted by: Mem | December 09, 2009 at 09:48 AM