Triangle Mamas

The Little Things

by Cyndi

When my first-born was about 6 weeks old, my BFF (who already had two children of her own) came up from Atlanta for a visit. In addition to offering me her shoulder to cry on (who knew motherhood was so exhausting?!) and her wonderful, wise company, she also gave me a most important gift -- she taught me the importance of knowing the best to places to shop when you have a nursing baby.

While she was in town, we went to the mall -- I'm not much of a mall-shopper, but I was desperate to learn how to leave my house with the new baby without having a total meltdown (and I mean, me melting down, not the baby). Together, we figured out which department stores had bathrooms with a lounge area and which shops didn't give the stink-eye when we sat in the changing rooms for a baby snack. Those stores quickly became the only places I went when I needed to shop in those early, scary, newborn months.

As Junius got older and we added Pippi to the mix, my needs have changed over time -- these days I don't worry about a place to nurse, but I am always on the lookout for shops with family-friendly bathrooms. With one child in diapers and one potty-trained, we need a little of everything on a good potty break.

Today, while having a much-needed lunch with a friend, I discovered an impressive little family touch in the ladies' room at Bruegger's Bagels in Ridge Road Shopping Center -- the "invisible" potty seat. It's one of those three part toilet seats with a regular seat, a kid-sized seat and a lid all on one hinge (see photo). It's a small change, but a big deal for a new potty-trainee whose tushie would fall through the regular-size seat. Even thought I was there sans-kiddos, I was still thrilled to see the attention to detail.

In a time when families can feel more than unwelcome in some stores (see the Michigan Target store that called the police about a breast-feeding mom earlier this month -- although to be fair, the family bathroom at the North Hills Target is always clean and easy for potty breaks), it's nice to see a business taking steps to make families comfortable.

Share your tips here -- what are your favorite family-friendly places in the Triangle?

When Cyndi isn't scoping out public restrooms, she can be found chasing her two children (ages 4.5 and almost 2) or writing at Junius & Pippi Take the Cake.

Image from Amazon.com.

An Unpaid Endorsement of My Holiday Haunts

by Ilina

With the holidays creeping upon us and beckoning us to the big box retailers, there are more than a few ideas brewing my head to keep it local this year. I'm making my list and checking it twice. Who am I kidding? I'm not checking it at all. It's all I can do to write the list down on a scrap of torn envelope from my daily ration of junk mail. There are some places I will hit this holiday season for sure. Keep in mind this is not host of paid endorsements; these are independently owned business that I happen love. I would love to know some of your faves, especially since mine are clearly Raleigh-centric! Here are a few of my favorite Triangle things.

Tookies Toys: Independently owned toy store in Cameron Village that carries an awesome selection of Playmobil and other European brands. The wall of games is great, and the beefed up science section leaves my six year old drooling. The best part is no crazy testosterone laden shoot 'em up flaming, bursting, wheeling toys that some "experts" think boys must play with. And hands down the best looking wrapped gifts to boot! Did I mention free gift wrapping?

The Lollipop Shop: Did someone mention candy? This is a newcomer to North Hills that carries a mouthwatering buffet, I mean array, of old school candy and new fangled treats. My sons love the wind up toys and teddy bear accessories. Deal recently chose a fire chief hat for his little sidekick "Beary." Bird indulged in colorful rock candy and German-made gummi bears. The rainbow of M & Ms and wall of Jelly Bellys make me feel like, well, a kid in a candy store!

Marbles Kids Museum and Museum of Life + Science: Wonderful places to wile away the hours, rain or shine. A museum membership makes a dandy holiday gift (and a fantastic present to a kid who's going to be a big brother or sister!). There are times we go to Marbles twice in a week just because the boys want to embrace their inner Scurvy Dog and Black Beard on the pirate ship or bang the drums in "Brazil." The Life + Science Museum never disappoints. The bears are always a kick, and the remote control sailboat racing makes us all captain for a day.

Moxie Kids: This is where the cool kids shop. Or in our case, this is where the cool kids' grandfather shops. If you happen to see my sons looking particularly snazzy, it's because they're sporting some Tea Collection or Charlie Rockets garb from Moxie Kids. The store is chic and cute without being pretentious. The girls clothes are simply breathtaking. It's almost worth having a baby girl just to shop there. Almost.

Cameron Village Library: Forget Cheers, this is the place where everybody knows our names. When Bird turned one we donated copies of his favorite books to the library to commemorate his birthday. If you, like me, see the magic of books, donating to your local library is a fine fine gift. Talk about the perfect gift for the person who has everything and the gift that keeps on giving all wrapped up in one handsome cliche package! Look for The Cat in the Hat at Cameron Village Library with Bird's nameplate pasted in the cover.

One last thing...

Over the holidays and randomly throughout the year, we take a batch of cupcakes or brownies to the fine fire fighters at Station 6. They've come not once, but twice to save my little Deal (once when he was choking and a second time when he did this). They literally saved my son's life. Twice. A few doses of sugar fail miserably as a thank you, but think about it, nothing is grand enough to show our gratitude for the best gift we have ever gotten.

Ilina blogs about her musings and sons' escapades at Dirt & Noise and supports local businesses in her off time. If you want to follow her non sequitors, follow her on Twitter @ilinap. She also somehow manages to run iFactor, her own marketing consulting business, and cooks home cooked meals every night. Almost.

Didn't you know they sell magic at Target?

It was one of those my baby is so cranky we will both explode if we stay inside kind of days. My son, Oscar has been waking up early from his afternoon naps which results in an earlier bedtime. This of course means we all get up at the crack of dawn and the cycle repeats. So, I thought we would go for a nice long stroll at North Hills. We started at Chick-Fil-A, because 1) Ahem, we live in North Carolina, and 2)They were doing a food drive for free sandwiches. 

I'll trade my cans of Tuna for a chicken sandwich ALL DAY LONG. 

And can I stop right there and talk about how I LOVE that little fake grassy area outside at North Hills? I never understood why they didn't just put real grass there. I mean I guess it is easier to maintain. But it always seemed odd to me that there was astro-turf outside. However, now that I am the mom of a very curious crawler, I thank the Lord for synthetic nature! I can let him crawl and roll around to his heart's content. And crawl he did! It was a beautiful day. 

We walked around the plaza for a bit and headed back down to our parking spot, conveniently located next to Target. OK fine, you're twisting my arm, I'll go inside the store! I grabbed a couple super cheap items for myself off the clearance rack (because nothing in my current wardrobe cost more than $3.74) and headed for the Cheerios. At this point Oscar was starting to get cranky and I realized we were almost an hour past nap time. He had been really good and my plan was working, so we walked toward the checkout. 

Just then, in the home section I heard the loveliest music-box rendition of Jingle Bells and I had to find it. Lo and Behold there was a snow globe with a reindeer inside and the music was playing. I shook it and thought, I bet Oscar would think this is neat. I leaned down and wound it up and shook the globe and there he sat, absolutely entranced. His eyes lit up and he was tracing each little snow flake with his fingers. We looked at a few more, each with their own Christmas Carol and it occurred to me that even though I have known this is his first Christmas, I hadn't really considered what it would be like for HIM. He is the perfect age to really have fun with it and for the first time, I understood why parents get so into the holidays. It's not about the latest greatest toy. It's about the magic! Watching his eyes get wide and excited was just about the best thing in the world. I can't wait to create that magic for him as the holidays draw near. That day, I found magic at Target. And yes, this December Oscar will be unwrapping his very own snow globe.

An original Triangle Mamas post. When Andrea is not getting all mushy in the home goods aisle, she can be found blogging at Lil-Kid-Things or gabbing away on Twitter. 

Confession: I Do Love a Jon Jon

We all have our varying opinions on the jon jon. Before Little Bird was born, I imagined him wearing nothing but jon jons, romping across the playground in his little smocked coveralls. I'm not sure what I was drinking at the time, but his entrance into real life complete with poop, pee, drool, dirt, and general stickiness soon changed my mind on the jon jon.

Now, I reserve the jon jon for church on Sunday morning and other occasions where he needs to be a little more dressed up. We don't wear them to Marbles, and he won't be wearing them to Mother's Morning Out, no matter how many other little boys will.

For some reason though, Bird still has way more jon jons hanging in his closet than I have pride to admit. I blame Kelly for this. Kelly runs Divine Consign in Raleigh. Divine Consign hosts trunk shows of overstocks and consignment sales a few times a year. It's not your average consignment sale. You don't have to dig through to find things that aren't stained or that you could buy just as cheaply if you caught them on clearance. Kelly takes only high end, gently worn children's clothes, saving moms like me who only like to shop in front of a computer screen a lot of time and hassle.

If she hadn't made it easy enough for us, now she has also started a blog. This post on how to shop a consignment sale was incredibly helpful, and I thought worth passing along.The next show is August 31 through September 4 at Stonehenge Shopping Center in Raleigh.

What about you? Do you hit consignment sales for your kids' clothing? What other ones are worth a look? Do you sell at consignment sales? Do you have any additional shopping or selling tips?

Let's help each other continue to dress our children way way better than we dress ourselves. That is until What Not to Wear shows up on my doorstep and rescues me from myself.

An original Triangle Mamas post. This post was not sponsored by Divine Consign in any way. We just happen to like moms in business for themselves, especially when they do it so well. In fact, if you have a mom in business here in the Triangle who you think we should feature, please contact us. We don't do reviews, but we share our positive and negative experiences freely here.

When Marty isn't busy ironing jon jons, she writes about everyday things at Don't Take the Repeats and Deep South Moms. When she has less to say, she hangs out on Twitter.

Maybe She's Just Having A Bad Day

My typical method for coping with being home with children all summer is to simply not be home.  Don’t get me wrong, I am a homebody at heart but I find that keeping us all out of the house as much as possible is best for everyone’s mood.  Out in the world, either at the museum, pool or the river, I find that I am more present with my kids.  I can interact with them without being distracted by other things that I think I should be doing.  No work, no household chores, no Facebook or blogs – just my children and me.

It sounds so perfectly serene, doesn’t it?  Except lately, each outing seems to end with my turning into that mom that is pitied, judged or held up as an example.  Take for instance, our last trip to the Museum of Life and Science.  Dean was bitten by what he described as a “small black spider” and his hand instantly began to swell.  He was in pain and we were the furthest point from the car that we could be so I rounded up my crew and we began to walk back to a place where we could get ice.  Not knowing if he had a Black Widow bite or something worse, I was worried and getting frustrated with Logan who was not cooperating.  Dean walked ahead and then was quickly out of my sight.  When we reached the spot I had assumed he would go, there was no Dean.  We had to go find him.  Jess, however, had the idea that we would stop and eat at the café and would not be consoled.  I was trying to stay calm but patient I was not.  We were all hot, hungry and tired.  I had to keep walking with a six year old having a tantrum and a two year old having a sit-in on the middle of the sidewalk. 

So I was shouting because I had one child not moving and too big and wet from water play to be carried, one child sobbing and walking away from me in his anger, and my oldest nowhere to be seen.  And people were looking.  I had one mom ask Logan where his mommy was and a staff person ask me if the crying boy belonged to me.  When Dean caught up with me, I yelled, “Where were you?!”   I think part of me wanted to be loud about it because I wanted everyone to know that I was scared - that I had good reason to be crabby with my kids.  So, yeah, I’m that mom.

Last week while Dean was at camp, I needed just a few things from the grocery store.  I took the youngest two into Whole Foods since we were in that neighborhood.  We started off so well.  Jess wanted to push the carriage and was navigating the tiny aisles full of obstacles carefully.  Logan chose some peaches that he literally chucked into the cart.  I winced at that bruising fruit and suggested we put the peaches in a bag since throwing them hurts them and makes them yucky.  Logan chose a few more and carefully placed them in the bag.  We moved on.  By the time we found the milk, I was less patient and just wanted our errand to be finished.  The quick stop was turning into a long, drawn-out affair and I was no longer interested in quietly using my “nice words.”  As I was trying to choose the coffee, firmly hold Logan in place in the carriage so he wouldn’t jump (again) and field Jess’ relentless stream of questions, I became increasingly snappish.  It was time to leave whether or not we had everything we needed.  In the checkout lane, a cashier suggested that I take the kids shopping at Super Wal-Mart instead.  “Excuse me?” I said.  Perhaps I didn’t hear him correctly.  He repeated himself adding, “If that is how they are going to behave…” I paid for my items and left the store – but not before accidentally ramming the cart into Logan’s face.  I do so like to make an exit scene.  Yeah, I’m that mom.

I’m the mom who goes somewhere with her kids and then when they leave, everyone else knows her children’s names.  I’m the mom who is constantly trying to choose between disciplining a child and letting him run amok.  I’m the mom who has to physically pull her child out of the pool because he doesn’t want to leave.  I’m the mom you hear hissing through clenched teeth, “You have until I count to three…” Luckily, no one has questioned what happens on three.  We’ve never had to find out.  I’m the mom who handles her children’s behaviors, no matter what scene ensues.

I’m the mom who has many tools in her toolbox to manage her children.  I’m the mom who sometimes runs out of tools.  I’m the mom who sometimes gets exhausted using the rights words all the time and making a game out of basic tasks.  I’m the mom who sometimes just needs her kids to get into the damn car seat already for the luvaGod.

I’m the mom who is sleep deprived and looks it.  And I’m the mom who might need her anti-depressant dose increased and her caffeine dose decreased.  I’m the mom who needs your compassion and understanding.  I might welcome a sympathetic smile rather than your judgmental and snide remarks.  I’m that mom and I’m every other mom.

I’m the mom who calls the store manager when she gets home to complain about the cashier’s rude comments and threatens a boycott on behalf of all moms.  (You with me?)  I’m the mom who can say her children are difficult but will take offense if someone else says it because I am their mom.  I live with them.  I am the mom raising them.  And I’m the mom who loves them.  I am well aware of their faults – and I love them anyway.

I’m not the mom that I thought I’d be.  Sometimes I have it all together and lots of times, I just don’t.  But my kids aren’t the kids I thought they would be either. I’m trying.  And I know they are too.  And 99% of the time, I wouldn’t change a thing.  But you’ll understand if you don’t see me shopping at Whole Foods for a while, won’t you?

This is a Triangle Mamas original post posted by Susie.  Susie occasionally blogs about the joys and mishaps of being a mom to three boys at At Home With Me when she is not busy being humiliated by pretentious store clerks.

Pharmacy Field Trips

(Four infected ears + four infected eyes) / two children = three pediatrician visits x one tired mommy.

Given that we've been making lots of trips to the pharmacy lately, I'm grateful that the people at the Hayes-Barton Pharmacy are so sweet and lovely. They help my children feel better by getting the medicine ready quickly, and they help me feel better by making it easy to patronize a local business. Plus Pippi likes the personal attention and Junius likes sitting near the counter to munch a bag of chips while we wait -- a small treat that goes a long way.

My father-in-law was a retail pharmacist for more than 40 years, and he sets a high standard for me in how I expect to be treated at the pharmacy. These days it's easy to drive through whatever Walgreens/Rite-Aid/CVS/Kerr drug store is on the nearest corner and never actually see your pharmacist.

But at Hayes-Barton Pharmacy, it's worth the walk inside to meet the pharmacists and assistants, to wander the small aisles and have someone know us by name. I figure they are as important to my children's health as their pediatricians -- and goodness knows we spend plenty of time in that office, too.

When she's not busy administering amoxicillin and augmentin, Cyndi can be found writing at Junius & Pippi Take the Cake.

Favorites at the Farmer's Market

One of my favorite things about living in Raleigh is having easy access to the State Farmer's Market. Lots of communities have local markets, but the one here is big and open seven days a week. You can find all sorts of things there, from flowers to fruit to framing to flags, and everything inbetween (whatever that might be).

I like to go on Sunday mornings after church -- it's not too crowded yet, although not all the vendors are open then either. If you've got time to spend, you can shop for veggies, wander through the crafts and then eat at one of the restaurants (our favorite is the seafood market -- get the shrimp sandwich and a side of fries).

The Farmer's Market is great year-round (and not just for pumpkins and Christmas trees), but here are five of my favorite foods you can get now (or at least soon):

   1. Strawberries -- Go ahead and buy the big basket. Eat some now (yogurt and granola, anyone?) and freeze some for later (perfect in smoothies).
   2. Peach salsa -- They also sell pineapple salsa and other tasty flavors, but the peach is the best and it's not too spicy.
   3. Sweet potatoes -- The state vegetable (what? you didn't know?) is so much better here than in stores. Wonderful flavor and beautiful orange color.
   4. Collards -- Good for you and taste good, too. Just don't boil them into oblivion. Slice them into strips with a little salt, water and olive oil, and cook until they're not crunchy but not soggy either (about 20 minutes).
   5. Peaches -- Not in yet, but they are oh-so-yummy. Ask for samples, but be sure to bring the wipes with you. You and your kids will be sticky.

Crossposted at Junius & Pippi Take the Cake, where you can find five of Cyndi's favorites every Friday.

Agoraphobics Unite

Despite the beautiful Autumnal temperatures, today was not a day I desired to leave the house.  It was just one of those days when I wanted to hunker down in my house, get some cleaning done, and then just laze about.  The only problem is that it’s grocery day.   I don’t know about your family but for us, grocery day cannot be delayed.  By grocery day, we are suffering a shortage of such necessities as bread, eggs, milk, and bananas.  I yearned to put it off until tomorrow but knew it needed to be done.

That’s when, in a moment of inspiration, the answer came to me.  I could just order my groceries online and pick them up in the morning.  The ultimate in convenience for a lazy-day sufferer like me. 

All I had to do was login, select a pick-up time, and begin making my list all while wearing my flannel pajamas.  Selecting items was as easy as click, click, click and I could even add special instructions like, “Green bananas, please.”  There’s even the added bonus of seeing an estimate of my growing total, which is more than I ever know in-store. The simplicity of it is really what makes Harris Teeter’s Express Lane such a phenomenal idea. 

Plus, if I were really organized, I could save custom lists for planned weekly menus and need only to add depleted staples.  In that case, I could be finished grocery shopping in 5 minutes flat.  (If only I were so organized.)

The only downside is that there is a $4.95 service charge after your first taste.  (The first time’s free!!)  Because of the fee, it is not something I do on a regular basis. (Although if I were working full-time I certainly would.)  But for days where my toddler is sick, days when I’m waiting on the cable guy, days when I have more chores than time, or just days where I don’t wanna, it’s nice to know Harris Teeter is there with their convenient shopping option.  And with eight different locations offering this service in the Triangle, there’s no reason you shouldn’t spoil yourself too.

Now, all that’s left to do is convince my husband to go pick them up. 

Abby is addicted to blogging.  Not only does she blog here at Triangle Mamas, she also blogs about motherhood on her personal blog, My Sweet Babboo.