I have this reoccurring dream.It’s rainy, it’s dark, and the kids and I have been stuck inside all day getting on each other’s nerves.
I have finished the dishes, the laundry, have given the kids their baths and got them ready for bed. With each household chore I accomplish I can feel the tension building in my body.My husband walks through the door, I give him a kiss and say “Their all yours.”
I skip out the door and feel the freedom on my skin. I arrive at my destination with all the tension in my body still rising, knowing that relief is just a few moments away.I change my clothes and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I feel a level of tension leave my body. I smile at myself as I walk out under the bright lights.
“Let’s do this.” I whisper to myself.The rest of the dream proceeds the same every time. I have left my house a tired, overstress stay-at-home mother and wife and morph into this badass motherf*@#!r of a roller derby girl.
I spend the next hour or so rolling away my stress, having fun, bonding with my friends and most importantly, kicking some booty.
Ahhhh…this dream makes me smile. I wish, wish, wish it could become a reality, but let’s face it, I am not that cool. Roller Derby? Hell yeah roller derby!Have you seen these chicks? They are tough, beautiful, strong, fearless and not afraid to show it.
Roller Derby is my secret fantasy. If I were young/lame enough to go onto MTV’s Made, I would ask to be "made" into a kick-ass roller derby player.
Now to be honest, I don’t know much about roller derby, but this has been a secret fantasy of mine for a while now. I totally fall for all that cheesy girl power crap every time.I drink out of a Wonder Woman mug every morning for Pete’s sake.
I think it is because it is the polar opposite of how I am on a daily basis. I have my real life where I am a mom and wife first and Sue second.I miss the days when I was able to work out hard, when I wanted and how I wanted. I used to be immersed in Tae Kwon Do and Kickboxing and not afraid to put myself out there and learn new things.
Now for the first time in my life I feel meek, detached from my new body, the body that motherhood has given. I no longer hold my head up high as I walk and almost feel betrayed by the strength I used to posses.
Could I make this a reality? Maybe? I did however, contact the Carolina Roller Girls to get more information about how try outs work and when and where they occur.Am I crazy?
Possibly, but I think it would be worth it to at least go see the Carolina Roller Girls in action. If I like what I see and don’t think the girls are too scary, maybe it will motivate me to get my strength back.
Do you have an alter ego you wish you could live out?
For now I will live vicariously through my dreams. Besides, it is fun to come up with what my roller derby name would be.