Triangle Mamas

Lost in Durham

by Abby

See this park.

Looking at this map, you'd never guess that this park is cloaked in an invisibility shield. You'd never know this because you would probably make all the right (or left) turns and end up zipping down the slide or flying in the swings in under five minutes.

I, on the other hand, fell victim to the park's invisibility shield for a full hour as I looped around and around just catching glimpses of what I knew must be the space in which the park was contained while never actually finding the entrance.

Sadly, I can't even use the excuse of it being in an unfamiliar neighborhood. This park is seriously right behind Local Yogurt and with as much time as I spend there, I should know my way around.

Instead, I will blame the trees which provided superior camouflage; the technology that was bombarding me (You try melding written directions from a friend with Google maps on your iPhone all while your GPS is screaming at you to "Turn around when possible."); the missing street sign on the corner; and what is obviously a secret government experiment in land disappearances.

Abby is constantly lost both on the actual road and on the road of life. But she does usually persevere and eventually finds her way. You can read about all her journeys at My Sweet Babboo or follow her ramblings on Twitter.

Halloween 2009, Triangle Mamas Style

In no particular order, here are some of the adorable children of the Triangle Mamas.

This is Abigail in her mama's German dirndl from when she was two.  NIkki says, "I like to think of this as her dramatic reenactment of Gretl's 'So Long, Farewell' exit in The Sound of Music."

Here are Juni and Pip, Cyndi's little ones. Buzz Lightyear here even had "Andy" written on the bottom of his shoe. Very authentic.

What might have been a dragon on the hanger became a dinosaur on Linus. Abby's little man was rawry scary.

From our newest Triangle Mama, Kelly, whose inaugural post will be live Wednesday, we have Mr. Wyatt.

Little Bird was a Little Bear for the day. Marty and her sewing machine pulled off a handmade Halloween again this year, but only with a couple of hours to spare.

Cindy's little dino was so excited, she had the costume on in Target the day they were picking it out.

 

Ilina had a handmade Halloween too. Here is Super Deal and Ninja Bird in all their glory.

Welcome to fall, y'all. Bring on the turkeys and the trees!

You mean I'm supposed to chew food?

I don't know how many times I've spent a morning dreaming of a day when Starbucks will add a train table if not an entire play area to their coffee shops. I mean, it could just be open for the mid-morning and late afternoon hours when caffeine-addicted moms need a place to get a hit while still entertaining and socializing their kids. Wouldn't it be great?

I know, I know, McDonald's now has McCafe's and Barnes & Noble even has Starbucks and train tables, but I hate McDonald's and Barnes & Nobles has shelves and shelves of books just taunting my toddler to destroy. I'm talking a gated play area where a coffee bar is within sight distance. Wouldn't it be loverly?

What I don't understand is why more places don't follow the lead of one of my favorite local restaurants, Blue Corn Cafe. This place has a separate rooms for patrons with kids and patrons without. It's so nice to not have to worry about your toddler throwing a tantrum because he wants his own bowl of guacamole to dip in because there's another one loudly demanding his quesadilla at the next table.

As if separate but equal dining spaces weren't enough, the with-kids dining room has a play area stocked with toys, a chalkboard covered wall, a play mat, and a full library of VHS kids tapes. While you are getting sat down and offered a menu, your preschooler is digging out a fire truck from the toy basket. I can't even remember another restaurant where I've been able to actually read the menu rather than just randomly selecting an entree.

Now I understand the importance of teaching your child to sit politely at the table, but there are just some nights I would like to sit and sip a really yummy Mojito without slurping it down between reiterations of "Sit down. Be patient." We work on manners at home and at other restaurants, but at Blue Corn, I prefer to sit back, munch on tasty fried plantain chips, and watch as my son lies on someone else's floor rolling cars back and forth.

If you're like me and could sometimes use the "dining out" option that really is a bit of a break, or if you just like really good Latin-American food, then Blue Corn Cafe on Durham's Ninth Street is the place for you.

Who knows? We might just see you there.

Crossposted at Abby's personal blog My Sweet Babboo where she doesn't just write about food. Although come to think of it, she does write about food a lot there too.

Le Sigh

I am convinced that the Triangle region of North Carolina is home to some of the worst drivers in the country. I mean, I'm totally cool with people who drive the speed limit, but people who drive 10 under on a road where most people drive 10 over? That's just annoying. Or worse yet, people who come to a stop, A STOP, at an on-ramp to wait  for a large enough clearing in freeway traffic to merge. Could they have not thought ahead and started looking at the traffic patterns before they got to the very end of the merge lane?

I guess my driving frustrations are starting to show. Today while riding in the car, once again frustrated at my fellow drivers, I heard Linus let out a big sigh. Unsure if I heard right, I questioned him, "What?" He again gave a very dramatic sigh. Thinking back, I realized that he was mimicking what I had just done when some irresponsible driver cut over 3 lanes of traffic while driving 20 under to catch an exit.

Lucky for me, a sigh was all I had for that driver. It used to be worse. I mean, my mom did teach me the superior communication ability of my middle finger in those situations.

Crossposted at My Sweet Babboo. When she's not journeying from playgroup to Target to Local Yogurt, Abby can be griping about it on Twitter or her personal blog, My Sweet Babboo.

Fourth Festivities

Even if you aren't heading to the beach for the holiday weekend, there is still plenty of fun happening right here in the Triangle. Here in Durham you even have parade options for the younger set.

Your first option is to participate in a 60 year running parade of children over in the Watts-Hillandale neighborhood. Bring your bikes, wagons, or strollers all decked out in red, white, and blue and join the parading masses as they celebrate the independence of our country, the spirit of children, and the comfort of good neighbors. Festivities begin at 10AM at the neighborhood's park in the 2200 block of West Club Blvd and will continue following the parade in Oval Park.

If your a bit more of a procrastinator, like me, you can opt to join in the less historical but just as fun Central Park Children's Parade. To participate, just bring your wagons and bikes to Central Park. The good folks from The Scrap Exchange will be on hand with plenty of re-purposed supplies for turning your tiny transportation into a spectacular Independence Day float. Central Park and The Scrap Exchange is located in the 500 block of Foster Street. Decorating begins at 9:45AM with the parade scheduled to depart at 10:45AM from the corner of Foster and West Corporation.

Both options are loads of fun and last just long enough to make sure that your baby, toddler, or preschooler is home in time for a quick lunch and afternoon nap. They are definitely gonna need that nap, and you too, if there is any hope of them staying awake to enjoy fireworks.

For other 4th of July activities going on around the Triangle, check out MyNC where they have a round up of the local festivities.

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Abby, an avid pie baker, is hoping for a long enough afternoon nap to throw together a cherry pie. Of course, if she gets too involved in blogging or Twitter, she'll get nothing done. You can read about all of her projects at her personal blog, My Sweet Babboo.

Peanuts and Cracker Jacks

If you're looking for Springtime activities for kids here in the Triangle, look no further than DBAP. That's Durham Bulls Athletic Park for the uninitiated. With sunshine, hot dogs, and cotton candy, it's got all the ingredients for a perfect kid day. Plus, with ice cold beer, baseball, and cotton candy, it's a fun for the parents as well. Linus, slathered from head to toe in sunscreen, attended his first game on Education Day. Although much busier than originally planned, it made for an exciting atmosphere with enthusiastic renditions of "Charge!" and the Sponge Bob Square Pants theme song.

Our family attended an 11AM game which worked perfectly around naptime but there are also early afternoon games and evening games. If you splurge ($2 more per seat), you can get seats under the awning which, for a fair child like mine, will ease your fears of sunburn. Linus was enthralled with the game, crowd, and Wool E. Bull and managed to sit through 6 innings during which we indulged in all the regular ballpark foods.

Just don't forget to purchase your Bulls hat before you leave the ballpark so you can root for the Bulls even outside of the ballpark.

Living is Easy with Eyes Closed

It's Spring time in the Triangle and you know what that means: STRAWBERRIES! Whether you find yours at the Farmers' Market or you head out and pick your own, the time to do it is now.

Linus's playgroup ventured to a local farm right here in Durham County where the berries were sweet, the weekday crowds small, and the picking cheap. At $1.35 per pound, you can afford to be greedy. Grab your buckets, baskets, and rainboots (if it's just rained) and get yourself to a farm.

They won't even mind if you taste a few.

Of course, the kids may be enthralled with the farm machinery far more than the berries but you'll be pleased either way.

Just Desserts

Warning: If you are on a diet and hoping to stay that way do NOT read this post. It will ruin your diet.

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Lately, my family has been in a bit of a food rut. I shouldn't say a food rut instead more of a restaurant rut. Here's an example of a common conversation at our house.

Hubby: What's for dinner?
Me: I don't know I forgot to thaw the chicken. What are YOU making? (said with undeserved snark)
Hubby: Well, we can just go out.
Me: (still irritated) Fine. Where?
Hubby: I don't know. Where do you want to go?
Me: (Huge dramatic sigh.) Why do I always have to decide everything? I'm sick of being the one who has to make all the decisions. You decide.
Hubby: (Now losing patience.) Fine, let's just go to Elmo's.
Me: Fine.

If that sounds about right for your family as well, I have a little something you might like.

It's a local blog called Carpe Durham. From what I can tell, it's written by a bunch of Duke Law students who have made it their goal to eat at a bunch of random Durham restaurants and then review them.

How's this great for you? It's going to help you mix it up a bit on those nights you just don't want to cook. Elmo's is great, but it can get old quickly.

Carpe Durham is a great resource for finding restaurants that aren't so mainstream. (These guys aren't visiting the apostrophes: Applebee's, Chili's, etc.)

My family has already tried out a few and I've got to say, I loved them.

Last Friday night, we hit up the top of our list for Carpe Durham recommendations, The Mad Popper,
to get a yummy treat for our movie night-in. The Mad Popper is a definite two thumbs up for a popcorn lover like me and pretty much anyone who likes sweet treats. With so many different flavors, it's hard to go wrong. We chose to fill our bucket with strawberry, Mad Popper mix, and the Mardi Gras mix (lemon, grape, and green apple). I'm thinking the Mad Popper may be my go-to place for hostess gifts from now on.

The next Carpe Durham recommendation we tried out was also amazing. It's one of those things where we are smacking ourselves for not trying earlier since it's only a few blocks from our house.  On Saturday mornings, about one block north of the Durham Farmer's Market at the corner of Foster and Geer streets sits an Airstream.  It is in this Airstream that you will find Daisycakes maker of the most delectable desserts and breakfast treats known to mankind. Their Hazelnut and Cherry Pop't-Arts are divine.  Linus, currently on the under 3 nut ban, sampled a scone and though he can't actually tell us he enjoyed it, there were only mere crumbs remaining when he was finished. Also sampled were a pair of cupcakes (one red velvet and another passion fruit-chocolate) which were not only visually stunning, but tasted great too.

So, here's my suggestion for the upcoming warm weather weekend- visit one if not both of these fine establishments or any of the others recommended by Carpe Durham. Spoil yourself with some treats and work off the calories during a stroll through Duke Gardens. You might even run into us doing the same thing.

An original Triangle Mamas post.  Abby, like her son Linus, loves good food. When she's not eating her way around Durham, she can be found blogging at My Sweet Babboo.

Motherhood Crazies

This wasn't at all what I was going to write about today, but I really wanted to share something, or I should say someone, I stumbled upon today while listening to NPR.

On Wednesday's broadcast of The State of Things on our local affiliate WUNC, the discussion was about Postpartum Depression (PPD) and it's effects on both mother and child's health as well as how it is treated and responded to in our current society. According to the show at least 15% of new mothers experience PPD, but most experts believe that number is low as many mothers simply do not seek help. It was a very interesting discussion and wonderful to learn that some of the greatest advances in helping PPD moms are being made right here in the Triangle. (Click here to listen.)

However, the most exciting thing to me was one of the panelists they had participating. Faulkner Fox is a local author and mother who has written a book about her experiences with new motherhood called, Dispatches from a Not-So-Perfect Life: or How I Learned to Love the House, the Man, the Child. I was very intrigued simply by the title but also her contributions to the discussion. She was speaking about the pressures to be the 'perfect' mother that society places on mothers. To say I was doing my best bobble-head impression would be underestimating my reaction. I found myself identifying with so much of what she was saying.

After listening to the discussion on my drive home from playgroup, I quickly logged on to the library site to see if her book was available. I intend to check it out as soon as possible and devour as time allows. Want to join me?

In the meantime, I also found myself nodding in agreement while reading an article she has written about mommies judging other mommies and the harmful effects of this kind of behavior. In all honesty, I've found the constant judgments from other parents to be one of the greatest challenges of being a new parent. And, I'm guilty of it myself. I've found my network of mommy bloggers to be one of mostly support but occasionally there are lurkers out there waiting to spew their ugliness (see anonymous commenter on this post of Steph's or Razzle on Kristen's fabulous post).

For my part, I try to be honest in my writing about the challenges, emotional ups and downs, and stresses of motherhood. I try not to hide it. I prefer not to just write about the happiness that my son and family bring me but also my struggles. I want other mothers to know that being a mother is not easy... not for me anyway.

So, I guess what I want to know from you is how can we change it? How do we stop with the ridiculous judgments and move forward to form a community of mommies? How will you yourself make an effort to change?


Crossposted at My Sweet Babboo. An avid listener of WUNC, Abby usually hears less than half of the each article because her toddler is loudly demanding more food. Read more about her life with Linus at My Sweet Babboo.

Power to the Mommies

Do you remember the Motrin Moms incident in November? It was one of the first times Mommy bloggers really used their power and change happened.

Once all of the talk and excitement settled down, the question remaining was, "What do you want to change next?" In January, the answer came with the impending enactment of the Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act of 2008 (CPSIA). Mommy bloggers, work-at-home moms, and moms everywhere were concerned about how increased and costly safety testing could put thousands of small businesses, Etsy sellers, and many, many work-at-home moms out of business.

Of course as mothers, we want the toys our children play with to be unequivocally safe and we want them to be lead-free. However this act in its sweeping legislative action would potentially have done more to hurt the safe toy industry then it was likely to help. What toys could be safer than ones made by other mommies who are solely dependent on customer happiness and loyalty to remain in business?

In the end, Mommies took to the internet voicing their concerns on blogs, Twitter, through their votes at change.org, and even by contacting their government representatives. And their voices were heard. On January 30th, the Consumer Products Safety Commission granted a one year stay of testing and certification requirements in order to have"more time to finalize four proposed rules which could relieve certain materials and products from lead testing and to issue more guidance on when testing is required and how it is to be conducted."

This was good news to everyone who voiced concerns over this act but most especially to the small businesses who would have been affected. Of course, it is important to note that the work is not finished as now input is needed in how to change this body of legislation to follow through on its good intentions without leaving the path of destruction the original bill would have.

As amazed as I was to see the stay happen, I was even more amazed at the power of the mom, the power of the people. All too often that sweatpants wearing, toddler toting mom is written off as unimportant compared to the executive in the Armani suit, but this stay proves that the mommies of this country have an incredible power and are beginning to use it. In that way, it really is going to be "The Year of the Mom".

An original Triangle Mamas post. Abby has to be vocal about government legislation that bothers her because she's more likely to be heard by the President than by her own 18 month old. She blogs, in case you'd like to listen, at My Sweet Babboo.