Pencil Me In

Scheduling is not the same as routine.

I can do routine. We have the same thing for breakfast each morning. A jar of fruit. Some banana and a handful of cheerios. Christopher sits in his highchair and the dogs lay patiently and wait to be pelted with little round pieces of cereal.

It's our morning routine that happens at 8:00, 9:00, or sometimes 10:00 in the morning.

At night, we eat dinner as a family. After dinner, we go upstairs. Christopher and I take a bath. Kevin gets the baby out of the tub and into his jammies. We play on the floor for a few minutes, read a book, always end with Snuggle Puppy, and then go to bed. As I nurse and rock him to sleep, we say our prayers.

It's our bedtime routine that starts anywhere from 5:00 on up to 7:30 or so.

What I cannot seem to manage, however, is to have these things happen at the same time each day. Like right now? It is 11:00 AM, and he hasn't had a morning nap yet. That would be because he woke up at 8:30 instead of 5:30 like he did yesterday. So no morning nap yet means that the afternoon nap is sketchy and bedtime might be at 7:00 tonight instead of 8:30.

There just isn't a schedule to our day.

I can't say it stresses me out, but it would make life easier if I could plan the timing of it better.

Maybe when he's older. Or maybe not. I imagine there are moms who do it any way possible out there. I would love to know how they make it work.

Comments

[Nita]

I totally get what you are saying. Same thing with Ricky. Bedtime is normally pretty much the same, but naps and meals...they vary.

If all else fails, I have learned that the swing can induce napping. That's very, very bad of me.

[susie]

Schedule implies a rigid timeline of events - setting the alarm to wake up, putting him in his crib to sleep when he may not be tired and in the chair to eat when he may not be hungry. Being a slacker mom, I never did that. And my kids really only napped by accident until they started walking and we just busier during the day. So I guess you can say I'm an attachment parent rather than a slacker mom - that's it...

[Unkempt Mommy]

I've had the same thoughts as you because our schedule is a lot like yours... basically the same routine everyday, but could vary by as much as 3 hours from day to day. I do find it frustrating sometimes. Like when I just want to sit and watch t.v. with my husband or sew after Scout goes to bed...only she's going to bed at 10 PM because she took a late nap. Ggggrrr.

But I feel deep down that I am doing the right thing by reading her cues instead of going by a rigid schedule. I know I would hate to be forced to go to sleep if was not tired. I would hate to be forced to eat if I was not hungry (and I would REALLY hate it if I was hungry and was made to go without a snack just because it's not time to eat LOL) I cannot make myself do that to her.

I used to be scared that I was starting a bad habit by giving up and letting her play instead of sleep when she refused to go to go down for a nap. But now, if I am getting the vibe from her that she is simply not sleepy, I let her get completely off schedule and try to put her back down when I see more signs of sleepiness.

Of course, there are times when I KNOW she's really sleepy and she's just being stubborn and fighting it. In those cases, I'm a little more persistent in my quest to get her to sleep - I'll keep things dark and I'll lay down with her and won't let her leave her bedroom to play.

I guess I said all of that just to say that I think you are doing a fantastic job. As long as you are reading your little one's cues, I think you are doing right by him. I know it's totally frustrating not having a set schedule sometimes, but I think that will come with time. At 1.5 years, we're not there yet either.

I'm with you - I'm curious about how mommies who have their babes on strict schedules do it too. Hhhhhhmmmm.